|
His ship had been blown into the water, but the enemy hadn't finished him yet. Sure, he didn't have a life-vest, a raft, or anything else to float on. He was in the middle of the ocean, with nothing but the wet clothes on his back. For a while he tried to swim. "I can make it..." he thought. "If only I give it my all and try." Wasting his energy, he struggled to move closer to where he figures land might be. Struggling to safety, but to no avail. At last, he gave up. He lay on his back... floating... drifting... "At least I'm not drowning... yet." he thought to himself optimistically. Thousands of miles from any land, safety, or warm dryness of a fire. Strangely, he didn't think of any of this at all. The only thing he longed for was his love. He wished the girl he loved back home were with him. Sure, he didn't wish for her to go through ANY of this, but the only thing that he really longed for, yearned for, was her company. He suddenly realized that it didn't matter a bit where he was. He could be in a log cabin somewhere, and all that would make him truly happy was her company. He could be in the largest city, and his only happiness would be because of her. He could be out, floating in the middle of the ocean... he could be... he WAS out, floating in the middle of the ocean. Suddenly, to his left, he felt a movement in the water... Was it a boat? No. It wasn't big enough to be any form of boat. Maybe a rock. Yeah... right... A rock... drifting in the ocean. "I've gone crazy," he swore to himself. He decided to find out what this thing moving alongside him was. Turning his head slightly to the left, he spotted the fin of a shark. "Oh crap." Jerking his head back up straight, he followed the movement of this shark out of the side of his eye. "Oh man. I'm a goner." His breathing grew slight but heavy. The inside of his head began to spin from the hyperventilation. And as quickly as it came... the shark was gone. "Did I dream that? Did that just happen? How long ago was that anyway?" Confusing himself with time and facts... it had been merely minutes since the shark had been there, and it felt like days... years even. "I am SO not sane. What is this? I am driving myself crazy," he thought aloud. A day passed. He hadn't eaten anything in a couple days. His lips were dry from dehydration. He wasn't sure if he should drink the water, or if that would just make it worse. He remembered something about that from his classes at the naval academy... just wasn't quite sure which one was correct. "Well, a bit of salt can't kill me, I guess... and I'd rather die of salt than dehydration." He rolled his head to the side and lapped up some of the bitter, salty water. "Ick... oh well. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger, I guess." "I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't have stepped on that one boat. Would I be here? Most likely not... But where would I be? Maybe something else might have happened to me. I could be dead now. Or I might be back home... with my love by my side... in front of a warm fire. Ok, ok, I don't want to think about that. I won't let myself think about that. Wait. In thinking so hard about how I am NOT going to think about my life back home, I am making myself think about it that much more." He chuckled to himself. "Yeah. I've gone nuts. Some form of sea madness. Hmmm... So THIS is what if feels like to be crazy. Appealing." Because he was so deep in thought, he failed to notice the ship that pulled up not even ten yards away. It was the middle of the night, so they hadn't seen him. Had he been aware of his surroundings, he probably would have noticed the large, well-lit vessel. But he continued to think... and the boat passed on by without even a single regard from the half-conscious castaway floating nearby. "I wonder what it would feel like to die. I'm not going to try to find out. I might be rescued soon. If I am not rescued, then I will eventually find out what it feels like, but until then, I had better keep watch for any passers-by. Are my eyes open or closed? What time is it? If my eyes are closed, it could be day and I wouldn't know." He attempted to open or close his eyes, depending on what position they were in now. No such luck. Or had he done something but just couldn't tell? "If his eyes had opened he would have seen the stars or the sun... maybe. Perhaps he had gone blind. Why is he using the third person?" he thought. "What was that? Did I even HEAR anything?" He heard nothing but then solemn ringing in his ears. Everything was quiet. Off in the distance, he could still hear the lapping of the waves. It seemed so far away. About as far away as everything else. Not only was he drifting freely in the ocean, but he was drifting away from life and reality as he knew it. "Am I still floating?" he pondered. "Or have I drowned already? Maybe this is what it feels like to die." What had happened to him? Was he dead or alive? Where was he? Would he ever see his love again? Would she ever see him again? Would he ever see ANYTHING again? Did he care? Why wasn't he trying to stay alive? Why was he just letting himself drift away? All these thoughts went through his head, and he didn't know the answer. Or did he know the answer but was too afraid to admit it to himself? Did he want to die? Did he want to live? Did he NOT want either of those? Was it his time to go? Has he gone? Maybe this was all just a dream, and in the morning he will wake up... safe... alive... home... and in the arms of the one he loves. Then again, maybe not. |